I'm not usually the type to criticize other writers, especially novice writers (like me). However, there are circumstances where it's perfectly acceptable to criticize the novice; for instance, if she takes liberty with her thesaurus, or if she believes her writing to be superior to that of her other classmates.
There are several in my class who hold these opinions, but one in particular more so than the others. I literally cringe when she volunteers to read her stuff. Phrases like "balloon carcasses" and "yay-yo" pour from her mouth, as she concentrates to retain the modest look on her face, yet unable to keep the slavering delight for her words out of her voice.
Today, her salvos kept going off for an eternity; I tried to muffle my ears from the blasts, but some of them got in: "...valium " "...smeared cigarette ashes on my husband's Egyptian cotton sheets..."; "...vodka haze..."; "...the demon box..."; "...behind my Gucci sunglasses...".
Ugh; who farted, right?
Eventually my deus ex machina finally arrived...the bell rang. Walking out into the crowded hall, I thought, Please don't let me be that bad of a writer!
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